


he could and would ( throw hands )

by snstnlflng9 (svntn)



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: 5 Things, 5 Times, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Library, M/M, but also hi this is a hot mess, chanhee likes to throw fists rather than accept feels ig, graduate student rowoon, side hwitae, undergraduate chanhee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:14:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25891915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/svntn/pseuds/snstnlflng9
Summary: 5-times that Sociology Grad Student Seokwoo indirectly confessed his feelings to Architecture Undergrad Chanhee and the 1-time Chanhee straight up said I LOVE YOU.or something close enough.
Relationships: Kang Chanhee | Chani/Kim Seokwoo | Rowoon
Comments: 1
Kudos: 38
Collections: Round One: Ringing In The Fanfare





	he could and would ( throw hands )

**Author's Note:**

> HELLOOOOO this is prompt F019:  
> 5 times A [Seokwoo] indirectly confessed his feelings to B [Chanhee] and 1 time he straight up said I LOVE YOU
> 
> \--
> 
> the biggest and sincerest apology that the quality of the fic is so wish-washy from writer's block :( i did try my best to fulfil the prompt and make it fluffy as possible, in addition to chanhee's "pov" being very egotistical in the most best boy kind of way

**i.)**

The library held many hiding spots beyond the typical sprawling out in the middle of stacks and corners back behind the last rows. If you needed true seclusion, the basement where they store all the microfilm, VHS and all that ancient stuff is the ideal place. Dust included but could be overlooked for the lack of people who wander through a day alone. And as a student worker in his second year of college, Chanhee learned this was the best off and on the clock hiding places ( big thanks to one of the Borrowing Associates he worked with. )

His book card squeaked as he rolled down the tunnel slash handicap ramp into the basement. Chanhee was often not the only student who volunteered to put away microfilm and large fine arts books since no one else wanted near them as if they were the plague. He doesn’t blame the other students, but well, it gave him a chance to chip off time till he could clock out for classes.

It took maybe ten minutes to finish locating all the boxes he had to put the film back into before he moved onto the worst part of it. He, like all the other students, absolutely hated handling the folio books ( they were a good half his size ) and reshelving them with other large ass books. Plus they were old and sensitive to brittle, falling apart in general. He gathered a few of them to lug ‘em to their home. As his eyes scanned the call numbers at the top of each aisle, his ears pricked from feet shuffling nearby. He glanced around and saw no one but his cart and his soaring imagination. Shrugging it off, he paid no mind.

The last folio slid into its home, Chanhee held a proud grin that his struggle was temporarily over ( until he got back to his cart where there was a whole other shelf still there. ) He plopped his butt onto the concrete, leaning his back against the shelves just enough so he doesn’t push any books back. It was well deserved, fight him. His body dragged from late nights at Arch Hall and early mornings for class/work. Just a few moments of rest would be fine-

“Chan?” His eyes snapped open as he turned to see who caught him red-handed. A tall male with 50/50 parted dark hair and curious brown eyes stared down at Chanhee from the opening of the stacks. The guy had an armful of Chanhee’s books tucked against his chest and a sense of gratitude washed over him as the other’s expression softened. 

A small smile makes its way to Chanhee’s face, says “Small break. I’ll get back to work.” He moves to get onto his feet, to do as he said but the other stops him by the time he’s kneeling position.

“I’ll cover for you. Rest up.” Before he could argue with the other, he was gone. Chanhee groaned out of annoyance because this wasn’t the first time and he wished it would end. The male, Seokwoo was a grad student that has found some attachment to Chanhee since he helped him find some stupid books on public relations after futile attempts to find them himself.

Now, don’t get Chanhee wrong. He is more than okay to help but after that visit, Seokwoo would specifically ask for his help. It got to the point where the front desk students and supervisor would just let Seokwoo WALK into the back office to seek Chanhee himself. After a week of that, Seokwoo finally asked for Chanhee’s number and they might have texted back and forth for a few weeks. He can’t remember anymore. He does remember when he noticed that his friends seamlessly included Seokwoo into their gatherings. ( To his luck, Zuho and Seokwoo were friends and that’s how that happened.)

They became friends a little over a year ago, a stupid 1st-year campus adjusting partner program that Chanhee’s mother signed him up for. How she did it, he doesn’t know. During that time he learned that Seokwoo was a considerate, good guy. He was easily stressed, much to others' surprise, but he knew how to alleviate it. When he wasn’t dealing with his usual workload, he was assisting others with their work, whether it be friends or his students. Seokwoo oozed kindness out his stupid pores. 

Unfortunately, that included helping, now 2nd-year Chanhee, with his schooling, and when too much, his work. However, Chanhee never verbally refused and low-key enjoyed the company Seokwoo gave. He didn’t like when the others sat too close or painfully invaded his personal bubble but there isn’t much Chanhee could do since his elbow jabs and kicking were only effective for so long that the elder didn’t even flinch anymore. Just stupidly smiled at him when Seokwoo thought he didn’t know. He did it. It was suffocating. 

Chanhee watched Seokwoo bumbling about through the open spaces between the shelves. He was truly too kind- but also dumb as hell. His mouth gaped as he witnessed Seokwoo shove a folio into the completely wrong shelf and oh my god-

“Wait! Seokwoo you can’t even read the call numbers!”

Chanhee has probably never gotten to his feet as fast as he did. Seokwoo cannot make a greater mess of his workplace.

**ii.)**

“I’m heading out first,” Chanhee called out. His punchcard between his fingers as he waved it towards his supervisor, who nodded his way.

“Study hard, Kang.”

With a smile, Chanhee chirped, “Yes, hyung.” turning away and out of the ‘authorized personnel’ space, he returned his card to its slot. Considering how busy his quarter was getting, he took his super’s encouragement well. The night was looking to be a long, busy one. Thank god he got that extra sleep last night.

Rounding the corner, Chan began to untangle his earbuds from his pockets when he came to a halt. It wasn’t abnormal but it was to see Seokwoo loitering around the lobby when the other had prior commitments.

“Seokwoo? Don’t you have a review?” Said male turned his head a little too quickly after he asked.

“We finished early so I came to see you.” Seokwoo had his signature, soft smile on his lips. If you squinted (not really) the fondness reached his beautiful eyes-

Beautiful? Gross, he didn’t say that. Chanhee stiffly nodded, not against the idea but not for it either, following the elder to find a study room or table. This proved harder to do but he kind of figured as he made his rounds that afternoon. For one they were also meandering through the renovated South building but when Seokwoo took a sudden turn toward the staircases that lead to the basement, Chanhee realized the other’s actual plan.

His favourite spot, while located where dust spawned like Maplestory monsters, was tucked into the decently-lit corner by the microfilm stacks. He deposited his bag onto the bench before throwing his whole upper body onto the table, still as he had left it an hour ago.

“Are you that excited to study?” Seokwoo hummed, following the same action as Chanhee minus the whole, exaggerated body flopping. That was too much for someone as pristine as Seokwoo (not really but he had a public image to uphold as a Graduate student ™.) 

“For sitting, yes.” He slid onto the bench, unpacking his stuff as he avoided the potentially adoring gaze he knew Seokwoo probably had on his face. Disgusting how one could possess such an amount of heart eye energy toward just one person. And he would know, after having spent 75% of his classes with Taeyang who heart-eyed at every attractive being with legs, he couldn’t comprehend Seokwoo.

A few hours had passed till Chanhee’s muscles yelled to be released from his current sitting position. A new record if he must say. The boy stretched out over his work, opting for a moment to rest at the position. His gaze flicked around the room, no one in sight, their table, Seokwoo was still there if not with an addition of a few books that weren’t there before, and then directly at Seokwoo. 

He wouldn’t openly admit to it, but Seokwoo giving his whole attention to something or someone was admirable. The way his facials were unnaturally relaxed as he took in all the information before him. Chocolate brown eyes scanning over the page, slender fingers working their own words down onto paper, and the occasional foot-tapping that wasn’t god awful annoying like some. Maybe that’s all the magic of being a dutiful student. (Chanhee wouldn’t entirely know but he wasn’t awful at study, his roommate could attest to that.) Or just stupid handsome.

“You okay?” Drawn out of his thoughts and very obvious staring, Chanhee blinked a few times. _Shit shit shit-_ Seokwoo’s brows were worried together when he didn’t respond fast enough. “Chan?”

“When is your next schedule?” Was the quickest and first thing Chanhee would muster out, simultaneously trying to force the flush back down under the collar of his shirt. He snatched up his pen, scribbling down equations that came to mind as some excuse of not coming off like a total creep.

“In a half-hour but,” Seokwoo stopped, a slight shifting of fabric against the cushion following, “Will you be okay studying alone? Till I come back?” He glanced up from his paper, immediately coming to terms with Seokwoo’s stupid face being _way_ to close.

“I’ll survive without your supervision for a few hours, _mom_.” The other backed off with a roll of his eyes. Truthfully, Chanhee did kind of need the ‘supervision’ so the company was always welcomed since mindlessly staring at his workbooks alone did little to his productivity levels. He needs the ‘competition’ sort of speech. His highschool friend group often held study dates so the transition into halfway through his first quarter of college, his grades reflected how much he needed that ritual back. Youngkyun, his roommate, was hardly in their dorm and Chanhee was too damn shy to loiter around alone at a huge table suited for a small group. Shyness and whatever other feelings that were.

“I’ll bring back chicken and coffee,” Seokwoo added as he began to stand, packing his things up. The pairing was odd but Chanhee would take it since he didn't enjoy beer as much. Hanging his head down, eyes training back on the now blurry words of his textbook, he could already feel his brain wanting a distraction. 

And then he felt a large hand ruffle the mop of hair atop his hand, lingering a bit before Chanhee’s hands began to slap at the invasive hand. Who does Seokwoo think he is? 

A charming chuckle came from above and that was the last string Chanhee could take before he swung his leg straight into the taller male’s shin.

**iii.)**

It might be welcomed but Chanhee’s college lifestyle revolved around school like the typical, boring good student during the day ( that takes maybe too many naps ) and hung out / partied during the weekends. He requires good student status for his sanity. High school really did ruin him didn’t it? 

With that came weekdays reserved for study dates in the dorm’s common spaces or in the elder library on campus. Chanhee hardly tangent off of the routine, cue the coincidences of Seokwoo ( and their friends ) rolling into his plans with the spontaneous event of soju shots for the of age members in the group and lowest % booze Inseong would allow the “babies” to have under their ( his ) supervision. 

The unexpected part was that Inseong brought booze with the guise they ALL to study as the priority. Chanhee was very confused by the male’s declaration when he barged into Youngkyun and his dorm that Tuesday night on one of their occasional nights in. Grad students are wild, Chanhee concludes. At least Inseong is anyway.

However, not to Chanhee’s surprise, it quickly became round after round of CLUE with the losers downing their respective beverage. Why CLUE he couldn’t quite figure out but if he were to guess it was the only the board game available at the library so Youngbin said ‘fuck it.’

Zuho, Youngbin, Inseong, Taeyang, Youngkyun, Chanhee and unfortunately Seokwoo managed to squish themselves into the confined space of their dorm room. Crowding around Zuho’s fold out table with belongings scattered here, there and everywhere. Books abandoned for emptied or half-empty cups, some full depending. Chanhee being the odd one out still had his textbook chilling on his lap, occasional page flips as reading progress got made. Between filtering terminology and theories of who killed in this room with this weapon, his mind felt overwhelmed.

This night was stupid.

The wrong of it is that while he did relocate from the table area to his own bed, still keeping himself in the liveliness, Seokwoo at one point uninvitedly plopped himself beside Chanhee. A jab to the taller’s ribs followed, despite doing nothing but almost sloshing soju onto his freshly clean bedding. He could and would kill. But as turns past, each time Seokwoo would return to his side, the elder’s hand naturally rested on the skin peeking out from the edge of Chanhee’s basketball shorts. Thumb mindlessly caressing the bare skin as if routine, as if he had done multiple times before.

It felt. Nice.

He was also just plain tired and wanted to go the heck to sleep.

“Mr. White used rope in the study!” Youngkyun slurred, eyes lazily landing on him or rather Seokwoo’s hand on Chanhee. Shuffles resonated as someone showed the young man their card for help. Secretively, even though Chanhee could easily tell, Taeyang was cheating by peeking over Youngkyun’s shoulder with the excuse of giving actual shoulder kisses.

Quickly his attention was diverted, thank god. But also-

Disgusting.

“Seokwoo- I mean Mustard, it’s your turn.” Zuho vocalises before taking a gulp of his soju. Aforementioned male scooted to the edge of the bed, his own thigh dangerously touching Chanhee as he did so. As soon as his turn ended, his hand returned to its spot as his free hand made notes in his phone to figure out his final guess.

Annoyed, Chanhee swatted the hand away then laid his book over the spot. Having earned a chuckle from beside him, but that was the only “winning gesture” as Seokwoo’s hand then found itself claiming Chanhee’s arm, wrist in specific as his fingers continued its soothing patterns into his palm. Whatever this was, was creating unease in his stomach but as quick as it came it left, replaced with an odd warmth that blossomed across the skin Seokwoo touched. 

“You can’t keep that. I need it to turn pages.” Chanhee remarked.

“I can do that for you,” Seokwoo comments back, a small smile on his lips. Chanhee rolled his eyes, the only action he did or else him decking Seokwoo would cause scolding from slightly drunk elders. 

“You’re annoying.”

“Nah.”

“Yes.” 

“Go back to studying, Chan.” It was a kind reminder, one that brought Chanhee from his hot air space into the calming one that benefited him most. Taking the hint, his eyes retreated back to the pages and sooner than he realized, Seokwoo’s caresses actually kept out the loudness of everyone else. 

However, Chanhee didn’t expect to wake up the next morning with his head in Seokwoo’s lap and everyone haphazardly laying atop one another passed out cold. 

Or Youngkyun blackmailing him that afternoon with a photo of Chanhee peacefully asleep with Seokwoo’s hand nestled into his hair. The result? Getting his roommate snacks and coffee for that night’s studying. 

Oh, and a nice soreness imprinted to Kyun’s shoulder.

**iv.)**

A soft, fluffy hug surrounding his body, Chanhee relished in the warmth and deep feeling of company there with him. More welcomed company than his randomly generated roommate that he, unfortunately, gets along with, in some kind of skewed friendship. Youngkyun was weird, Chanhee was weird. They worked. But these occasional moments of simply appreciating where Chanhee was, kept him grounded and gave him time to reflect on his current doings.

_Inhale, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5._

_Exhale, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5._

His fingertips smoothed over the airy material of his sheets, a satisfying ‘swoosh’ coming off the contact. A few paces skimmed by until his fingers grasped the material and flopped it over itself, exposing his skin to the cooler air beyond the safety of his covers. His eyes screwed shut with the wash of fresher air.

“I thought you had died under there for a moment.”

Youngkyun’s voice was too close for how clear it was. Peeking an eye opened, Chanhee immediately saw the thin face of his roommate’s. A mischievous, cat-like smile very present in his view. 

“I wish I had so I didn’t have to see your ugly face.” Chanhee remarks, face void of any emotion as they hold prolonged eye contact. Youngkyun rolls his eyes, predictably so, before leaning away to resume his prior tasks. Rolling his chair back to his respective desk. Whatever those tasks even consisted of. 

“Your phone has been seizing for the last twenty minutes,” Youngkyun informs, back now facing him, “I think it’s your sister?” 

At the mention of his elder sister, he jolted up and threw himself out bed to reach for his now dormant device. Thumbing over the screen a myriad of missed call notifications rose to his attention. It wasn't every day his sister reached out to him, especially not since she was busy working fulltime and a half and he was busy getting a degree. However, the fact he got only calls and no texts sent a brick-like sensation dropping into his gut.

With resolution, he swiped over one of the notifications to call her back. Quicker than unlocking his dreaded phone. Plus he could very well risk factory resetting it with his bloody luck. 

Just as quick as the dial tone came it had gone and his sibling's voice filled his ear.

"What were you doing?!" She half-shouted, half-sobbed, "Jesus christ Nee, do you have any idea-"

"What's going on?" He interrupted, opting out of getting lectured and vying for the important aspect of this call. His sister tended to get off topic when very, very, very emotional. IT wasn’t a family thing but yet, here she was. 

"Father is in critical care."

All the warmth Chanhee had acquired left his body a chilled ice cube. His blood rushed loudly in his ear that it overwhelmed all his other senses. A white noise sensation filled his fingertips, his phone threatening to slip from his fingers onto the floor. White flashed across his vision one second and the next his eyelids fell closed purely out not knowing what to even do. What was he supposed to do as his sister continuously rambled into his ear, words that he wouldn't make coherent.

“Chan?”

Phone dropping onto the floor, jolting Chanhee’s attention onto the owner’s voice, Younkyun peering down at him. A crick in his back bringing him to wonder when he slouched onto the floor. No words needed exchanging as his current position answered loudly enough. 

In the next moment his roommate replaced Chanhee’s phone into his own, carrying on the conversation like the proper adult Youngkyun was over him. He’s not jealous. The pair exchanged fast words, almost like simlingish, as he remained on the floor. Surely he climbed onto his feet, using his bed as an extra hand to weigh himself onto.

“We’ll be there soon.” We? His phone is handed back to him followed by a rather stoic Youngkyun grabbing Chanhee’s backpack from nearby, stuffing it with a set of random clothing, and shoving it into his arms. For once he couldn’t comprehend what exactly was happening aside from the fact that he felt like he was five years old and getting shipped away to his grandparents for a night because his parents were having a date night-

Oh, his parents. His father.

If Chanhee were to pull up his phone, he couldn’t he left it at home, and type in ‘rough’ difficult or unpleasant would not begin to describe how harsh the clinic lights were on his eyes, how chaotic his sister was when she saw him and Youngkyun rudely ran through the hallways (at one point Chanhee almost kissed the polished flooring), how jarring it was to see his father in such an unpleasant status.

It shook his heart and soul to its core. 

Nausea crept up his throat with each negative, worrying yet frustrating thought passing through his mind.

Mental discipline, or wellbeing, whatever one wants to call it, is a finer aspect to his persona. Being calm and collected permanently scrawled on his resume’s skill column, directly under honesty. Seokwoo would verbally agree to that too- Huh?

However, a mere couple house under the harsh lighting tipped his unhealthy state over the edge that even the nurse attending his father asked if Chanhee was going to be ok. Youngkyun thought at the time to make a joke about being a college student that earned him a swift punch to the arm. It took another hour or so before they were escorted out, mainly because he was going to pass out any second and the last thing he wanted was to bring his family even more stress.

He felt useless.

Their room was dark, a faint luminance from the street light fighting its way through the blinds stationary on the wooden floor, and void of human existence or, well, movement. 

When they got back to campus, Youngkyun broke off but not without being reassured Chanhee would be okay (he insisted Kyun go spend time doing what he needed after the poor time spent with him at the hospital.) He doubts by the look in the other’s eye that he didn’t believe the charade of endless nods and ‘yes, yes, yes’ Chanhee put on before inevitably closing the heavy door on Kyun’s face and the deafening sound of the automatic lock clicking. 

He needed space, he needed time alone. He needed to calm the racing everything that was racking through his body.

His sheets laid pooled over his bare feet, the fabric now cold to touch despite the fact he had been contributing body heat to it for a while now. He missed the warmth of this morning, how blissfully it felt, the loudness of rustling material signifying life underneath the trap a satisfying sound to his ears. 

After a moment, he reached over to his desk and plucked his now dormant phone off the surface with previously acknowledged shaky hands. A huff of air followed by a breathy, raspberry to shake it off. Fingers dancing across the screen till he grew somewhat content with himself. Partially feeling remorse as he replaces the device on his desk. 

‘Everything will be fine.’ Chanhee tells himself, eyes slipping closed and mentally starting a countdown from ten. Full intention when he opened his eyes, everything would dissipate into a horrible dream. However, that wasn’t the case. Chanhee didn’t have to open his eyes to know that, yet, deep down he just had a small bunch of hope that-

Loud thumping, like someone accidentally falling into their door, startled Chanhee out his thoughts and back into reality if someone really just did that. Pulling the sheet away from him, slowly he climbed off the mattress and across the room. With great effort too. Legs falling from under him from the lack of prolonged movement. Weird. Had it really been that long?

At the sound of his apparent collapse, the panicked movement came from beyond the door. The knob pathetically turned with no result until the obvious sound of a key card swiping peaking Chanhee’s attention because whoever this was, wasn’t Youngkyun. The other typically didn’t exhibit clumsy spells, in fact, he was a sloth for better words.

“Who's there?” Chanhee vocalized, still unmoved from the cold flooring. No response came. “Give me a second-” Finally, to both their resolve, the door swung open to reveal a tall male with a puffing chest half stumbled in.

Seokwoo.

Immediately turning and spotting the younger of the two, Chanhee quizzically stared back as all the worry washed off of Seokwoo’s features, replaced with relief and..was that happiness? Seokwoo unceremoniously fell to his knees before Chanhee and partially threw his arms around him. It was as suffocating as his whole trip to the hospital earlier but at least this time warmth mixed in. More than welcomed. 

Time ticked by before the taller's legs gave out, awkwardly sprawling out to what he would consider very uncomfortable. Which meant nothing since Seokwoo didn’t voice any discomfort just pulling him impossibly closer. 

“It’s okay to lean on me.” An airy whisper ghosted his ear. 

Slowly and weakly, Chanhee’s arms found their way around Seokwoo with any discoverable strength to fist at the material of the other’s shirt. His cheek rested against the broad shoulder and his eyes slipped shut for the umpteenth time that day. Sleep sounds better and better…

“I’m here to catch you, don’t worry.” Chanhee groans at this, because of course, Seokwoo would say something so pathetically stupid to make him feel ‘better’. It didn’t. It made all the noise in his mind return. Overwhelming him all over again to the point of a migraine. But he let the elder have this one moment. Sleepiness settling into his bones and burrowing deep into his joints where it was most welcome.

“Shut up..” He weakly mumbles. A hearty vibration is shared with his own body, meaning that Seokwoo at least still found some humour out of Chanhee still having bite.

He supposes anyway.

“Do you want to move into bed?” 

“Moving sounds awful.”

“Your legs would probably appreciate a change in posture.”

“Fuck my legs-”

“Kang Chanhee.”

“Fine.” Chanhee sighs, “I’m getting sleepy anyway.” A first admitting such, sleep was always the enemy he fought with occasional Adderall and buckets of caffeine. He was going to be invincible to sleep if it killed him. (Not really but he could wish.)

The arms around him slid away for a moment to then be extended out like a branch, offering Chanhee support as he hauled himself up to then be guided safely to his bed. He hated the whole exchange of Seokwoo coaching him back and down onto his own bed, Seokwoo’s hand resting at his back as if he always touched Chanhee there until he could properly lay down. The cherry on top being Seokwoo peering down at him with puppy eyes. Sickening. What did he want? To cuddle with him- Oh. Wait.

Groaning, “You can join...if you want…” Before he can even see the elder’s reaction to his invite, he palms his eyes with the hope he can just, like, bury them deep into his skull that he dies or something.

The flannel sheets rustle and let in a small breeze before all the cold let in dissolves into the heart that Chanhee has craved since he left bed early that morning. His fingers itched to get closure to the source and while he hated the thought alone, he plopped his arms to his sides in defeat. 

“What’s wrong?” Seokwoo voices from beside Chanhee. Even a genius can tell that Seokwoo is restraining himself from getting closer too, from hugging Chanhee close once more.

“Why are you a goddamn space heater?”

“What-” Seokwoo pauses, “Well, I did just run across campus.”

“You’re so annoying.”

“You said I can join!”

“That’s not what I meant you baboon.” 

A momentary pause, “Baboon? So, like…”

Warmth shuffles closer and closer until Chanhee is blanketed in it. Unapologetically so. Seokwoo’s arms find themselves around Chanhee’s shoulders, bringing him closer until his cheek is smushed up against the taller’s chest where he is then held firmly. On any other day, this would be an acceptable form of skinship without the obnoxious amount of squishing, smothering even. He hated the elder’s tendencies the most.

Chanhee wasn’t going to fight though. 

Letting himself soak in the moment, he burrowed into the other’s embrace until he couldn’t and all that left him was the sense of normal he so desperately wanted back. A soft hum surrounded the pair soon after. The tune most likely something poppy yet soft that Seokwoo had been looping recently, as that’s how it usually went with him. Though annoying but appreciated as he relaxed, his eyes closed and fell into a stable breath.

He supposes that he’ll let Seokwoo hold him like this for a little bit longer.

**v.)**

Chanhee had been in the middle of a very intense game of Overwatch when for the hundredth time his phone loudly vibrated against the wooden grain of his desk. Someone or someone really had something to tell him. Calling him would be more efficient, while very intrusive, though he wouldn't say that aloud. He hadn’t answered the phone anyway.

With the match over, a 'W' for his team and a shiny, new rank gained for himself, he picked up the annoyingly active device and thumbed his way through the multiple notifications before slowly realizing Seokwoo's name at the top of every single one. Chanhee groans at this and rubs the expanse of his face.

seokwoo

-final grades are in!

Gross. Why on Earth would Chanhee support the idea that he had finals once upon a time and had to actually support his college education on the scholarships that banked on the letter grades he received. It was nauseating to the point of him feeling an oncoming headache.

seokwoo

-chanhee?

-did you do well?

-i see your blizzard id is online! stop ignoring me!

Ten seconds remained before he got booted for being inactive from the next round. His mind conflicted on what to do and if he was patient enough to deal with Youngkyun voice calling him on discord to tell him he’s the worst human on the face of the earth, why the hell would he leave Kyun with fucking Yonghee. Blah, blah, blah.

chanhee

-i didn't give you my number so you can harass me during summer break

-or my blizzard id so you could keep tabs on my online time

-pls delete my information, saem

seokwoo

-not funny

Unknown to him, a small smile formed on his lips as the message popped up once more that hour. The routine of Seokwoo periodically reminding Chanhee of his existence outside of campus and the seasons not associated with regularly scheduled education was oddly becoming a time he looked forward to in his busy days. (This wasn't to say he was taking 2 summer classes.) Chanhee tossed the device onto his desk and heaved himself back towards his computer, opting out of the next round, much to Youngkyun's loud objections, to tend to Seokwoo's bidding for once. He might as well entertain the elder.

Opening up a browser window and collecting his phone into hand, he tapped Messages open and composed a new response to the other.

chanhee

-saem i got a 3.5 gpa

seokwoo

-stop calling me 'saem'

-but congrats!

A smile found its way onto Chanhee’s lips as his eyes scanned over the pair of messages. Out of triumph from annoying the elder and pride from praise, but maybe also the attention he was getting straight from Seokwoo’s almost instant responses.

chanhee

-only when you stop bothering me

seokwoo

-you would have blocked me if I was really bothering you

chanhee

-i'll leave first saem

seokwoo

-😒

**+i.)**

The fall air tasted different crisper this time around as Chanhee and his parents unloaded his things from the family Hyundai onto the cold pavement outside his dorm building of the year. Thankfully this time around his mother was not an emotional puddle, but unfortunately, his father was still on his case about being a junior that still lives in the dorms. An endless cycle of Chanhee just reminding his papa that he had a scholarship to cover room and board and free money was worth the hassle of repacking twice a year. However, despite this touching moment between him and his parents, Chanhee was anxious. Ansty even for his parents to give him an obligatory break from moving, being Youngkyun and his family in addition to his own, and just letting him run off energy from being trapped in the car for hours.

His mother wasn’t making that entirely easy this time around and Youngkyun, the ever angel he was, gave him no opening to flee. What good is having the same roommate and stupid best friend for three years if he won’t assist Chanhee in escaping for just half an hour? Nothing. Nothing is good about Youngkyun. The all-knowing glances he would give Chanhee spoke that loudly enough.

“I heard that you went camping on Jeju? How did that go?” Mrs Kim asked from her perch on Youngkyun’s bed, unloading her son’s luggage so the son could put it all away. They always had a system of moving in and out that honestly made him a little jealous but he wouldn’t say that aloud. Or accept having that much of a “thing” with his family to expedite his leisurely pace. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. No matter what the attendee’s outside said about parking time limits. 

“It was beautiful. We spent most of the time on the beaches..”

Chanhee’s mind couldn’t bother with the repetitive words flowing from his mother's tongue. It was the talk of the “town” with her, not another topic beating it out with all the neighbourhood aunties or random convenience store clerks from back home. At one point he probably recited it in his sleep. Beautiful, refreshing beaches, blue blue sky, cool drinks in the burning sand through the soft of their towels. Chanhee lived in the water, “it was so cute” when in reality he just didn’t want to feel gross and hot. 

“Umma, I’m going to get some air and drinks.” Chanhee pipes up from the box he was working on. His mother almost knocked down a few of his books she had been putting up. A fair reaction since he probably hadn’t uttered a single word besides ‘hello Mrs. kim!’ when he stepped into the threshold

“Don’t take too long, okay?” His mother smiles his way, the kind that makes him feel bad for asking to leave. Her guilt doesn’t stick because she knows why he’s been so _odd_. The smile quirks a little when they make eye contact, soft from her and just barely begging from him. At least bring back good news, is what he can audibly hear without actually hearing her. 

“Bring back two coffees for me!” Youngkyun shouts from beyond the door that Chanhee swung open so quickly.

Just before summer began, they had settled under one of the trees outside the new building Seokwoo was being moved too. Boxes sat on each side of them. Journalism college finally was able to move into their new building which meant all the current graduate students got to move along a little early.

Seokwoo wanted to get his things moved ASAP due to wanting to get home sooner than later. As if he really had anywhere to go when he lived off-campus with Inseong and neither had plans to relocate until they had stable jobs. Part of Chanhee looks at the pair, wondering if that’s how he and Youngkyun will end up throughout their undergraduate career.

Now, under the same sun as then, Chanhee was sprinting across the bustling campus. Students fully moved in rejoining their old friends from last semester, freshmen and their parents spending the last waking moments they can together, and just stragglers relaxing before the academic year truly begins with hammock lounging and cloud watching. Weird things like that.

As if his bolting around people wasn’t weird either.

It was plenty weird.

Even Chanhee’s pride scolded him for not being more rational, walking would have gotten him to the same destination! It didn’t matter though, he had to hurry. Time was slipping through his stupid fingertips.

His eyes scanned through the obnoxiously large directory plaque adhered to the ‘you-can-still-smell-the-new-paint’ wall when one enters the humanities college. Surprisingly the new building felt a lot more formal than the previous building, adding a sort of sophistication without making it too formal. These losers weren’t the business college after all.

With the floor and suite number memorized to the best of his ability, Chanhee once more began to sprint down unoccupied halls and impatiently up flights of stairs, thankfully not barrel rolling into any faculty, staff or god forbid campus security. 

The last thing anyone needed, Chanhee specifically, was someone to stop him to scold him about proper indoor manners. He hadn’t spent the whole summer dwelling over the empty feeling that sat in the pit of his stomach for adults to scold him for smelling like teenage spirit. But also, fuck you fight me, Chanhee is a mature as hell nineteen year old. His mother said so. (Not really, his sister said so.)

Serials of numbers blurred in his vision until finally, fucking finally, his eye’s caught onto a specific name proudly displayed on a shiny door plate placed on the wall. His feet almost tripping over themselves as he skidded to a halt, a stutter of trouble as he regained his balance. 

“Kim Seokwoo & Kim Youngbin: Sociology”

And as quickly as he stopped all the nervous energy he held for the last 24 hours wrapped itself around Chanhee’s whole body. Just beyond the deep oak door is Seokwoo, probably organizing his belongings or readying his syllabi for his students. Worst case scenario is Youngbin is also there, clinging to Seokwoo and complaining about having to teach freshmen AGAIN. 

But Chanhee doesn’t have time for the ‘ifs’, opting for a bold (read: impatient) approach and grabbing the handle with so much force he didn’t know he had after running across campus. Once more almost tripping over his own feet, he stumbles in and is met with only a single pair of wide eyes peering at him.

Oh bless.

Hunching over, the train of overexertion hit Chanhee as his hands found purchase on his knees. But as soon as the train came, it went. 

Straightening up, he half-shouted, “Seok!” A choke following from lack of breathing. The called for remained rooted in his spot, frozen from surprise and maybe confusion. Once the initial shock wore off and Chanhee hadn’t continued, did he finally speak. In his defence, he was still dying right in front of the taller but still.

“Is everything okay?” Seokwoo asks, manoeuvring around his desk to stand before him, reaching out predictably so to cup Chanhee’s cheeks in his hands. His eyes scanning over the younger for any signs he should worry about. A bright smile blooms across Chanhee’s lips at this simple gesture. Man did he miss this. 

“I missed you.” Is all he says before throwing his arms around the taller and hugging him so desperately as if making up time for not having the elder in his arms. His cheek rests upon the broad chest as all the tired oozed out of his bones and into the other that held him up.

A sturdiness welcomed Chanhee, a feeling he missed dearly in the wake of the nights he felt dejected after shitty rounds of PUBG and people yelling at him, and general longing during boring afternoons when he usually had someone (Seokwoo) bothering him to end on a normal day. Returning the gesture, fondly he rests his chin on Chanhee’s head and makes a home in the windblown nest called his hair.

Whispering, “I missed you too, Chan.” 


End file.
